For All 10 Of You Who Think Her "Dumb Blonde" Act Is A Fake, Read On . . .

How dumb is Paris Hilton? Let us count the ways.

Worldwide Entertainment Group is looking for $75,000 in damages for what they see as the celebutante's failure to deliver on her contractually obligated "reasonable promotion and publicity" for the National Lampoon-branded bomb, Pledge This! Though, they seemingly have no problem with the fact Paris has no acting talent whatsoever.

Seriously, producers were resting their hopes of a successful film on P. Hilt?! Did they not see the Hottie and the Nottie?

During her deposition Paris said, among other moronic things, that she doesn't know what an executive producer does, despite being listed as one in the credits. "I'm not sure what a producer does," she said. "I don't know, help get cool people in the cast."

She's like a walking dumb blonde joke. "Hey, did you hear the one about Paris Hilton and a redhead going into a bar . . ."

Her idea of movie promotion? Any chance I got I would bring it up by saying Oh, my new sorority film, it's going to be sexy, it's going to be really hot girls.

Hmmm, interesting defense strategy: If the accused is an idiot, you must acquit!

Also revealed, the professional red carpet walker is so busy with her other deals, party appearances and TV gigs that she's never even seen her own cell-phone bill.
Asked who pays the bills, she replied: "I don't know. I'm assuming, like, whoever pays my bills...I never ask about that stuff."

Maybe she should just use Google to see how much she owes, the same way she uses it to somehow keep track of her business meetings, I just press my name and Google it and see.

God, how does this wonky-eyed mental midget manage to walk and talk at the same time without three hours of practice every day!?

Her attorney came to her defense, saying "She's the single busiest person on the planet."

You hear that President Obama? Stop lazing around with your meetings and your economic summits and start working as hard as Paris! The rest of us should get off our duffs and start living up to her example, too.

We're no Jack McCoy, but can't they just find Paris guilty of being the dumbest person on the planet and skip right to the sentencing phase? Maybe no red carpet appearances or tiny dogs for thirty days or something . . .

By Paige Muller

Paige Muller, Gossip & Hollywood Hijinx
		About the author:
		Paige Muller is a gossip gal with an appreciation – some would say obsession – for Hollywood hijinx, celebrity style and the latest fashion trends.  From who hooked up, who's knocked up and "WTF are they wearing?", Paige offers all the dish, with a side of snark. When not pondering Jennifer Aniston's perplexing post-breakup PR strategy, Paige is a published writer and communications professional who has worked with brands like Dove, L'Oreal, More magazine, Gap and WE: Woman's Entertainment.
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