Bruno's Mooning Eclipses Lame Award Show

MTV is like a Betamax in a Blu-Ray world, so it's no wonder the crappy teen reality show channel needed a big stunt to boost last night's MTV Movie Awards and help maintain it's slipping grasp on pop culture relevancy.

So what could have been better than host Sacha Baron Cohen teabagging Eminem?

Or as we like to call it "Taintgate 09."

Dressed in assless white underwear and angel wings, the likes of which Bobby Trendy would probably consider casual wear, Cohen was rigged up to the ceiling as his gay Austrian alter ego, Bruno. He began to descend downwards toward the stage, until his wing snagged on some equipment, sending him face down into Eminem's lap, where the notoriously homophobic rapper was faced with his worst nightmare: man balls in his face.

Apparently unhappy at being made the (literal) butt of Cohen's joke, the rapper was heard shouting: "Are you serious? Are you f--king serious? Get this motherf--ker off me," as his minders struggled to extricate his head from between the comedian's thighs before the entire entourage stormed out of the theater.

Watch video of the stunt: here

Now the big debate that has the Internets buzzing is: Was the stunt real or was it staged? And more importantly, did Cohen wax or shave? Sooo many questions.

Mark Burnett, who produced the show, had already dropped hints that something epic involving Eminem was planned before air time. And Eminem was coincidentally (not) mic'd during the "incident." Why mic him if he wasn't intended to be heard?

A source says Eminem was asked to partake in the stunt, but kept him in the dark about getting up close and personal with Bruno's manly bits. Parasite Hilton
was supposedly asked to do it originally, but she turned them down. At this point, she'd have to engage in full-on sex with a midget in public for anyone to so much as blink an eye. We're so jaded.

Besides, the only thing Eminem has a sense of humor about is dumping his wife's body in a shallow grave then making it home for story time with his kid. If the
stunt had been real, Em's camp would have already released a rant-filled denial. And then announced that the rapper would perform a duet with Adam Lambert.

The only thing that could have er, topped this (*snickering like a drunken frat boy*) time waster is if Cohen had staged a face-to-thong meeting with Zac Efron---Perez Hilton would have been in an absolute tizzy.

But how funny is it that the man otherwise known as Marshall Mathers' biggest headlines in forever are thanks to SBC's balls? He should send Cohen a thank-you card and flowers, and a life-time supply of Nair.

By Paige Muller

Paige Muller, Gossip & Hollywood Hijinx
		About the author:
		Paige Muller is a gossip gal with an appreciation – some would say obsession – for Hollywood hijinx, celebrity style and the latest fashion trends.  From who hooked up, who's knocked up and "WTF are they wearing?", Paige offers all the dish, with a side of snark. When not pondering Jennifer Aniston's perplexing post-breakup PR strategy, Paige is a published writer and communications professional who has worked with brands like Dove, L'Oreal, More magazine, Gap and WE: Woman's Entertainment.
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