When you've been in a relationship with the same person for many years, it's easy to occasionally get annoyed, irritated and even pissed off with each other.

I don't care how great, generous or funny the person is. It's natural to go through phases where you feel "off" and more distant than the space between Tory Spelling's boobs. But I make a conscious effort to have these periods between my husband and I short lived. Why? Because I know that there are certain times when I really do need him.

Now I consider myself to be a very independent, strong and highly capable person. I'm very comfortable spending time on my own and I don't "need" anyone to fulfill me or bring me happiness. But all my strength quickly weakens when I'm in the company of anything with more than four legs.

A few days ago I was sitting in my backyard soaking up some natural Vitamin D while my son explored his surroundings. As he was poking around our bushes, he very casually informed me that there was a spider. Tapping into my inner Zen master who respects all living things, I encouraged him to leave it alone and just let it be. When my husband joined us outside, my son told him to look at the spider. Compliant, my husband who is a camp director and loves all things nature, looked a little put off. Against my better judgment, I hesitantly walked over to see what got my "outdoorsy" husband to want to flee inside. Immediately, I felt panic set in and the need to put my house on the market. What I saw hanging before me caused me to replace my inner Zen master with my inner Dictator. That massive Arachnid had to die but I sure as hell wasn't going to be the one to do it. (By the way, this is the actual spider that was in my backyard. This is not stock photography, people).

I realize that being a damsel in distress and needing a man to kill a spider for me sets me back a bunch of decades and prohibits me from ever being welcome at a Lilith Fair concert. It also reminds me to be grateful to my husband for all that he does for our family.

As working moms, we shoulder a lot of the load. And even though it may seem like we "do it all", I encourage you to think about some of the things that your partner does to contribute. It may not come in the form of bedtime routines, meal preparation or any type of housework. But if what he does prevents you from needing future shock therapy, I say give him a big fat kiss and throw in a foot rub. Because to me, killing a massive spider is worth a heck of a lot in my books.

Carly Cooper
		About the author:
		Carly Cooper is a certified Life Coach for 'Moms'. She gets motherhood because she is a mother. She understands the struggles with guilt and finding a work/life balance as she herself is a working mother. For more information about Carly, her services and to request a complimentary coaching consultation visit her website at www.balance-the-mother-load.com.
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