From Mean Girls To Secret "Celebrity" Hoarder, On The Next Jerry Springer!

Has been.

Crackity crackhead, pill popper, drunk, kleptomaniac.

As if she doesn't already have enough problems, Lindsay Lohan is apparently also a hoarder.

At least that's what The Insider would like you to believe in their riveting expose, "Oh My God, Lindsay Lohan is a Secret Celebrity Hoarder!" Doesn't quite have the same ring to it as Chris Hanson's To Catch A Predator does it?

Linds' apartment is a pigsty, with one room littered floor-to-ceiling with piles of clothes, shoes and other expensive junk.

I try not to come in here, that's how bad it is, she said of the spare bedroom in the condo she moved into last year. It gives me anxiety being in here. The clutter takes up a lot of space mentally.

Let's be real, Lindsay Lohan is NOT a hoarder. They didn't find even a mummified cat carcass in her apartment, which as anyone who watches Hoarders on A&E knows, is one of the classic signs. Lindsay is just goddamn lazy. Her life is a complete train wreck, so it makes sense her house would be, too.

It looks like she stole racks of clothes from different photo shoots. Like straight pushed it out the door while everyone had their backs turned. Maybe she just hasn't had time to pawn them off yet. Have you ever thought of that, Insider? Not such a compelling story now, is it?

The show will hold an intervention with a professional closet organizer and help Lohan clean up in part two of the interview. There's really an easier way for LiLo to get rid of all that crap. Half of it probably isn't even hers, so if you lost anything (even a sock in the dryer) in the past year, just show up to LiLo's den of crackery to claim your stuff before 1-800-Got-Junk? shows up.

And maybe it's time to get new people when the only TV show you can get booked on is The Insider and Hoarders. Just a thought, Linds.

By Paige Muller

Paige Muller, Gossip & Hollywood Hijinx
		About the author:
		Paige Muller is a gossip gal with an appreciation – some would say obsession – for Hollywood hijinx, celebrity style and the latest fashion trends.  From who hooked up, who's knocked up and "WTF are they wearing?", Paige offers all the dish, with a side of snark. When not pondering Jennifer Aniston's perplexing post-breakup PR strategy, Paige is a published writer and communications professional who has worked with brands like Dove, L'Oreal, More magazine, Gap and WE: Woman's Entertainment.
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