This Just Proves That Having Leonardo DiCaprio Faux Hump Your Wife While You Film Is Never A Good Idea

Apparently it was Break-Up Weekend so if you're coming into some refund money this year, Swanson's single-serve microwave meals might be a worthy investment.

There was that one couple we didn't really care about and only reported because it was a slow news day, and now this one that we also don't really care about but always thought would be together forever because they're so very boring. And British.

After seven years of marriage, Kate Winslet and Sam Mendes have gone their separate ways. They issued a mutual statement through a lawyer: "Kate and Sam are saddened to announce that they separated earlier this year. The split is entirely amicable and is by mutual agreement. Both parties are fully committed to the future joint parenting of their children.They ask that the media respect the privacy of the family." ?

What caused the split?

Nobody knows at the moment some are claiming that Sam Mendes was too much of a homebody for Kate Winslet, others are claiming that Kate Winslet is impossible to live with. Nobody has yet claimed that it was because Sam Mendes's career is on the slide and Kate Winslet wants to align herself with someone who'll win her another Oscar, but we expect they'll get around to it by the weekend.

According to a source, the tipping point was when Mendes directed Winslet in Revolutionary Road. That movie put a lot of stress on their marriage, the friend said. Kate came to regret making the movie with Sam. They've been pretty much living separate lives since the end of the summer, the friend said. They realized some time ago that they were not a good fit. They were more like brother and sister.

Some have used the Winslet/ Mendes split to express fear for Sandra Bullock's marriage, blaming the "Oscar Curse" (cue ominous music). Kate Winslet is just the latest in a long line of actresses to split up with their partners after winning a Best Actress Oscar. Julia Roberts and Benjamin Bratt broke up. Halle Berry and Eric Benet same. Hilary Swank and Chad Lowe. Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillippe. Charlize Theron and ... that guy. And now Kate Winslet and Sam Mendes.

Conclusion: winning an Oscar for Best Actress will kill your marriage. Is it a coincidence that the Oscar itself is basically a big golden dildo? We think not.

But OMG you guys, now that she's single, this TOTALLY means that Kate is going to dive to the bottom of the ocean to grab Leonardo DiCaprio's hand and bring him back to shore with her so they can live happily ever after. SQUEE! Well, at least until the Enquirer reports that Leo secretly knocked up their baby-sitter.

What? Come on, this is Hollywood. The only true happy endings require a major credit card, a valid form of ID and an appointment at the free clinic.

By Paige Muller

Paige Muller, Gossip & Hollywood Hijinx
		About the author:
		Paige Muller is a gossip gal with an appreciation – some would say obsession – for Hollywood hijinx, celebrity style and the latest fashion trends.  From who hooked up, who's knocked up and "WTF are they wearing?", Paige offers all the dish, with a side of snark. When not pondering Jennifer Aniston's perplexing post-breakup PR strategy, Paige is a published writer and communications professional who has worked with brands like Dove, L'Oreal, More magazine, Gap and WE: Woman's Entertainment.
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