When the Beat of Your Own Drum Needs Another

As previously stated, I'm an independent woman who enjoys her own company. But when it comes to concerts, it's way more fun to rock out with a buddy. Since I don't have a boyfriend to drag out to the June 2nd Nine Inch Nails/Jane's Addition show, or any girlfriends into the same tunes, I decided to post an ad on Craigslist for a concert buddy.

Not even 48 hours after posting the ad, I had over 200 replies clogging my inbox. I honestly thought I'd garner minimal replies since I never really explored Craigslist's dating section and thought it was overlooked by everyone else as well. This coming from a gal who tried LavaLife, eHarmony, PlentyOfFish, Campuskiss, Lemontonic and countless other dating sites. I was bewildered to see the number of replies climb to 400 after a week and a half. But as I examined the responses, only about 5% of guys seemed interested in going to the rock show with me.

Here's how you can tell if a guy is sincere in his response to your dating profile or ad:

1. He writes more than two sentences

A lot of guys will only send a one liner like Hey cutie ;)' or You're really sexy' or I'd love to take you out to dinner.' Did he even read your post? Seriously, if you wrote a mini novel about yourself, then expect some effort on his part. If this is all you get in his reply, delete and move on to the next message.

2. He asks questions.

If a guy is serious in knowing more about the woman behind the computer screen he'll ask questions about your hobbies, friends and hang out spots. This should continue well into a couple email exchanges, otherwise he's not keen on you. Use your common sense, especially if he asks where you live. Telling him a part of town, like The West End or The Entertainment District is a lot safer for you than narrowing it down to specific street names. And never give out your address!

3. In his message, he refers to something you wrote in your ad

Using mine as an example, I only replied to the guys who were keen on the concert buddy idea. They wrote to me about some of the best shows they've seen, whether or not they already saw the band I was referring to, and asked where my seats were located. These are the type of guys I'm looking for. These are the only guys I replied to.

4. His grammar is generally pretty good.

Sure, we all are victim to typos sometimes, but if he can't tell the difference between the words Your and You're or Their and There, he's either not taking the time to send you a quality note or he's a dumb goomba not worthy of your time.

Don't feel bad about having preferences. That's what dating is about! And with online dating, it's even easier to delete' a guy from your life. If he doesn't interest you right away, don't waste your time being nice' to send a reply. It'll only encourage him to write you back and then you're stuck with an okay guy you're not interested in.

I've only seriously been communicating with four guys about the rock show. Four out of 400! Trust me, you're allowed to be picky. You're time is far too valuable.

By Christine Atkinson

Christine Atkinson, Manventures
		About the author:
		You can thank Christine’s Montreal roots for her sass and unveiled approach to sex and relating. Now based in Toronto, this self-proclaimed music (and sex) fiend consistently finds her dating world to be wrought with wrenches. Is this master dater truly the queen of her domain? Or is she unwittingly a victim of deceitful (and delicious) men? In either case, her misadventures are littered with hilarious mishaps and quirky events which prove dating an extreme sport for the heart (and inner thighs) in a metropolitan city.
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