How some situations can test your mettle

Today was one of those days where I got to see what I was truly made of. I'm currently working at a summer camp for kids and one of the campers approached me complaining that his heart was beating really fast. The old me would have passed the buck and fled the scene in fear. But today I acted differently. I stuck around and called for the camp nurse and doctor. I responsibly passed the buck and considered myself "off the hook." A few minutes later I was told that this kid needed to go to the hospital and we should call an ambulance. Not thinking about the gazillion reasons why I was the worst person for this job, I ran up to the office and relayed the message to the closest person to a phone. To anyone who truly knows me, this act alone would have been impressive enough.
I'm the one who almost fainted a few years back when my husband asked me to look in his eye because he thought something was in it. I'm the person who spent over a year and a half in hypnotherapy because I was so terrified of blood, vomit and anything related to a hospital. They want me to deal with this?
When the 911 call was placed, the camp director looked around the office to see who could accompany this 14-year-old boy. I heard myself say "I'll go." Wait. Did I actually say that out loud? It was more surprising than this year's final results show of American Idol. (I still think Adam Lambert should have won. But I digress.) The next thing I knew, I was riding shotgun in an ambulance with a kid I barely knew going to a hospital in a small town. The perfect setting for a Stephen King novel.
The paramedic was one of those super nice guys who's truly passionate about what he does. I made the mistake of asking what was wrong with the kid and I got a 15-minute explanation about the heart, how it works and more crap I can't recall because I was too busy trying to decide which smutty magazine I was going to buy at the gift shop.
When we got to the hospital, they wheeled the kid in and I eagerly followed the sign pointing straight to the CLOSED gift shop. UGH! Now what was I going to do? And then it happened. The skies parted and I heard the angels singing. I saw an empty waiting room, a mounted TV and a clock that said 4:30pm. I bought myself a Diet Coke, a paper (for the crossword) and turned the channel to The Young and the Restless. Things were looking up. For me, anyway.
A few minutes later, two correctional officers accompanied a man sporting ankle and hand cuffs. The plot thickens. They got settled a few seats away from me. Did I mention the waiting room was empty? I don't know what I was more scared of. The fact that I had a potentially diseased criminal a few vinyl seats away from me or that I was out in public wearing Crocs with socks and that appeared to be the norm here.
A million questions flooded my mind. Was he going to kill me because I was watching Y&R? Does he watch it too and need an update? What was he in for? (I wanted to know for both hospital and jail).
I hadn't heard any news about the kid for a while and I wasn't interested in being the hostage when this felon unlocked his cuffs with a smuggled bobby pin. (I've seen a lot of crime dramas, okay?) I figured sitting with the kid in his emergency room was a safer place to be. Even if it meant watching The Elderly and the Mangled.
In his room, there was no TV and nothing to read. Serenity now! We chatted about camp, school and how long it takes to be seen in emergency. In a desperate attempt to fill the awkward silences, I decided to tell him my story of how I spent 12 hours in "emerge" last December. Being a 14 year old boy, I thought he'd just grunt and move on. But no, he asked me what I was there for. I struggled to answer him because I didn't think it was appropriate for me to tell him that I was there because I had a miscarriage. But I've been so open about it, I couldn't find my filter in time and it just came out of my mouth. He looked slightly confused and I was hoping he'd just forget it. But he said, "Wait, with Jack?" Oy! (For those of you reading my blog for the first time, my son Jack is turning three in August). All I could hear was Whitney Houston singing "I believe the children are our future. Teach them well and let them lead the way." How could I in good conscience let this kid think that miscarried babies are living happy, healthy lives? I gave him a very quick, G-rated explanation and prayed that the inmate would bust into our room, drag me out by my hair and save me from this awkward moment.
After four interesting hours, we left the hospital. The kid was happy that nothing serious was wrong with him and he'd be back at camp in time to attend his evening program with his buddies. I was thrilled that I didn't code when I saw the word "Triage."
I believe I made the transition to "coping adult" when I became a mom. And my actions today proved that I'm stronger than I give myself credit for. When I need to step it up, I can deliver. Motherhood changes you. It can wear you down if you let it. But it can also make you rise to the occasion and become a better version of yourself. Even if you're wearing Crocs with socks.

By Carly Cooper

Carly Cooper
		About the author:
		Carly Cooper is a certified Life Coach for 'Moms'. She gets motherhood because she is a mother. She understands the struggles with guilt and finding a work/life balance as she herself is a working mother. For more information about Carly, her services and to request a complimentary coaching consultation visit her website at www.balance-the-mother-load.com.
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